So it is no secret that through reasons that are no longer here nor there I am single. It has been a long, long time.. but here I am. So like everyone else in my situation I created an online dating profile after getting the blessing from my ex and an assurance that she had moved on and was ok with it.
Everything in that regard is running on schedule. I get messages and flirtatious interactions. Honestly, if it went beyond that I wouldn't have a clue what to do. However, it has been through those interactions that I began to realize... I'm not like everyone else. I process things differently.. I am a pain in the ass. But I don't think I am alone. I am part of a unique group of people ..Entertainers.
An entertainer can be anyone who engages strangers for the purpose of thier entertainment.. Jugglers, Artists, Singers, Musicians, Magicians, Actors, Stage Hands.. you get the picture. In my case I work with a direct live audience as a mobile DJ, and in a more subdued environment on the radio.
As I was talking to one woman that I am especially fond of last night I began to notice that instead of having a serious conversation with out any jibber jabber, I was wrapping a serious conversation around various jokes and gags. In radio everything has to have a meaningful wrap up or a punchline.. I was doing the same with her. A few days ago I sent her a selfie of me wearing blue.. I am notorious for always wearing black.. simply because I can't match colors and it is easy for me. She complimented me and my reply was classic radio but not exactly a great romantic move... "i like wearing colors but some times I get messy"... that should have been the end...nope... "this morning I managed to lean into fresh bird poop before even getting in the car." Silence.. silence.. silence.
I did a similar thing last night when talking about a potntial date.. After I bombed it I asked her if she had ever dated an entertainer before. She hadn't. It dawned on me that we are a weird bunch. So here is a guide for dating an entertainer.
- We live and die for your approval. You are only as good as your last review, right? You are our number one fan and critic we need constant praise and adjulation...Sounds like a huge PITA right? Not when you consider what you get in return. Which brings us to,,,,
- We will do whatever we can to engage you , satisfy you and make you happy... no matter what is going on in our lives at that moment. We thrive on positive feed back and the best way to get that is to create a positive experience. Even when we can't be with you we are thinking about making you happy.
- We will drive you nuts with grand gestures... You mention you like yellow? We will buy you so many yellow flowers that you will wonder what is wrong with us.. We are entertainers, that's what. Everything with us is on a magnified scale. The down side. We are also perfectionists. So that grand gesture might take months from idea to event.
- We like you and might even fall in love with you, but we are dedicated to our jobs.. Mainly because we know our time in the spotlight is limited. It isn't our intention to not be there for you... it's just that the demand for jobs like ours is far higher than the number of actual opportunities. For every hollywood actress on the screen there are 1000 others waiting their turn. Please don't be jealous of dedication. We might spend our time putting smiles on the faces of strangers, but understand your smile is the most important to us.
- Our schedules suck. In my case, I manage my own carreer, and alot of us do. I spend your standard 9-5 m-f in the office lining up events and weekends performing. Again, there is no place we would rather be than with our loved ones, but this is how we make a living.. Honestly, for a lot of us it is the only way we can make a living.
- Our hearts are on our sleeves.. if you wanna know just ask. I have yet to meet an entertainer that is closed off.
- We can struggle when we aren't performing. Especially if we do it full time.. We might need some extra attention and affirmation during our down time.. or we may amp up our personalities and perform for you (want it or not). We may also get very down.
- We might be into doing grand gestures, but so many of the people we meet are not genuinly interested in us vs. our jobs that even the smallest kindness from you toward us will mean the world. Letters, texts, and pecks on the cheek are awesome. Genuine affection and interest is amazing to us.
- We see things totally differently than most. For me the world and everything in it needs a punchline.. Tell me I look nice I will try to make you laugh with a joke about bird poop. We aren't weirdos.. It is just hard to turn the switch off, and really the best we can do is put it in sleep mode most of the time.
- Passion... we are loaded with it.
So there you have it.. Things to know if you want to try having a relationship with an entertainer.
Good luck.. We are bad...we're just different.
